Ultimately, we can’t have connection with our partner unless we feel safe.
Yet often the things that we do to make ourselves feel safe are the things that push our partner farther away.
Like storming out of the room in the middle of an argument.
Or gossiping to other people, when you need validation that you’re right and your partner’s wrong.
Or emotionally shutting down and withdrawing, when you feel blamed, judged, or like you’ve screwed up.
It kind of makes love feel like this Catch 22. You can have safety at the expense of connection, or you can have connection at the expense of safety.
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Nate started his journey to unlocking the secrets of epic relationships back in 2012 when he and his friend Melissa went on a cross-country road trip with the goal of interviewing America’s most in-love couples.
Since then, he’s given a TEDx talk, his podcast has been downloaded over 1 million times. He’s built and sold a date-in-a-box subscription business. And he’s worked with some of the top names in the relationship industry.
Nate’s believes Roommate Syndrome is a feature of long-term romantic relationships, not a bug. It’s there to teach you how to outgrow your problems and limitations. And as you change and evolve, your partner will be forced to change and evolve with you
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Previously Published on growthmarriage.com
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