Every man should travel using nothing but public transportation and hitch-hiking. Jack Kerouac dedicated an entire novel to doing just that. Inspired by him, I travel using public transportation whenever I can. The first lesson I’ve learned is that nobody is paying attention to what you’re doing. Too many people are worried about people judging them. I’ve learned the exact opposite is true.
People are too busy judging themselves and caring about themselves to judge you. When I was taking the bus on way to the beach I was extremely self-conscious. I thought that everybody was judging me for not only taking the bus but for going to the beach alone. I got on the bus, sat down, and took a good look around. Nobody looked at me, and the people who did took a quick glance and continued what they were doing. This feeling was revealing.
It was as if a weight was lifted off of my shoulders; everybody is too busy paying attention to themselves to pay attention to you. This lesson may not seem important, but too many people are scared to do what they want because of the judgment they’ll receive from others. People won’t do anything alone because they’re afraid of the judgment of the people doing the same activity with friends or a loved one. I’m happy to inform you that you’re not even on the radar.
I was at Sunset cliffs trying to watch the sunset. I was extremely nervous because I was surrounded by groups of people and couples. I had to take a deep breath and a good look around. Nobody was looking at me. I realized I was too busy caring about what other people thought of me when I should have been enjoying the sunset. The rest of the sunset was gorgeous and I felt as light as a feather.
A man defines himself. He cannot be worried about how others define him because doing so takes away the power he has in himself. Nobody is judging you, and if they are, it’s passing and fleeting. Nothing a man should worry about. Worry about enjoying life and doing what you want to do. If you want to go see a sunset alone, go see a sunset alone. If you want to go see a movie, go see a movie. Nobody is stopping you but yourself.
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