In quarantine, I am my kids’ teacher. I have begun growing a long beard and wearing a pointed hat.
About Shannon Carpenter
Let’s Take a Tour of My New Outside Quarantined Home Office
I’m quite proud of the broken lawn chair that I’ve turned into my filing cabinet.
I’m quite proud of the broken lawn chair that I’ve turned into my filing cabinet.
Everyone Is Home. Now What?
Take the advice of a long time at-home parent, you got this.
Take the advice of a long time at-home parent, you got this.
Toilet Paper in Times of Crisis
Cross-referenced with my extensive dad knowledge about toilet paper, here is what I can assume about the current situation.
Cross-referenced with my extensive dad knowledge about toilet paper, here is what I can assume about the current situation.
The Rules of Toddler Chess
You have to expect the unexpected.
You have to expect the unexpected.
Teaching Our Kids to Watch Where They Are Going
Sometimes, they have to take one to the face.
Sometimes, they have to take one to the face.
Some Days, I Just Need Everyone to Put a Shirt On
I am debating fashion with a five-year-old. I have lost and it's not even 8:04 yet.
I am debating fashion with a five-year-old. I have lost and it’s not even 8:04 yet.
Triumphs in Potty Training
(Although as an FYI, you shouldn't encourage your son to pee in a flower pot.)
(Although as an FYI, you shouldn’t encourage your son to pee in a flower pot.)
Opportunities for the At-Home-Parent
"I know that this isn’t your favorite thing,” my wife’s Big Boss said at her work office party. He couldn’t have been more wrong.
“I know that this isn’t your favorite thing,” my wife’s Big Boss said at her work office party. He couldn’t have been more wrong.
Welcome to Fatherhood! Let Me Take You on a Tour of Stains
If you're not getting dirty, you're not doing it right.
If you’re not getting dirty, you’re not doing it right.
The Parenting Paradox
All along the way, I told myself that it would get easier. That one day they wouldn't need me as involved with them as much. It came true.
All along the way, I told myself that it would get easier. That one day they wouldn’t need me as involved with them as much. It came true.
The Importance of Protecting Your Nether Regions from Tiny Fists of Fury
Our children are born with a primal instinct to smash our privates. I think it’s an evolutionary thing to prevent further competition from being conceived.
Our children are born with a primal instinct to smash our privates. I think it’s an evolutionary thing to prevent further competition from being conceived.
Has Fatherhood Made Me Dumb?
I used to know what Hawking's Radiation is. Now I forget to zip up my pants.
I used to know what Hawking’s Radiation is. Now I forget to zip up my pants.
Watching Award Shows With Our Daughters
So, okay, I'm not a fan of current pop culture. But I am a fan of spending time with my daughter.
So, okay, I’m not a fan of current pop culture. But I am a fan of spending time with my daughter.
The Value Of A Good Henge
A henge is a more than just stones, it's an adventure.
A henge is a more than just stones, it’s an adventure.
11 Things I’m Grateful for This Holiday Season
Hugs given to dad as Christmas presents. Let's be honest, that's really the only thing he wants and is the perfect fit every time.
Hugs given to dad as Christmas presents. Let’s be honest, that’s really the only thing he wants and is the perfect fit every time.